Cincinnati Bengals

Go For Two: NFL Week 15 Games to Watch

What the hell, man? Week 15! The season is almost over! No!!!!!!!!!!

Thankfully the next three weeks should be fantastic.

These are the NFL Week 15 games to watch ...

Dolphins (7-6, 9th seed) at Patriots (10-3, 1st seed): I thought this would be a game of the week, and while I would very much enjoy watching it, when I researched playoff rankings, the Dolphins are currently the 9th seed. I'm not so sure they make it into the spectacular this year. So, if I am simply picking games based on playoff race, this puppy doesn't make it into week 15 games to watch. That makes me sad and that's why I am not erasing this as a slot in the game of the week. Love you Tannehill.

Broncos (10-3, 2nd seed) at Chargers (8-5, 6th seed): Everyone needs to stop with the Peyton is showing is age just because he didn't throw a touchdown pass. You know what, I take that back, he is showing his age, through maturity. He wants to win. If a rushing TD gets him that win, that's all he cares about. Dan Marino was the best of the best, never won a Super Bowl. Peyton wants the Super Bowl.

As for this game, the Chargers are barely holding onto that 6th seed. The Chargers will not take the AFC West division champs from the Broncos, so the Chargers really need to win this game by hook-or-by-crook to keep their wild card hopes alive. The Chargers, Steelers, Ravens are all 8-5. The Steelers (8-5, 5th seed), may or may not beat the Falcons, the Bengals (8-4-1, 4th seed) may or may not beat the Browns, but the Ravens (8-5, 7th seed) are going to beat the Jaguars. The Chargers still have the Niners (7-6) and the Chiefs (7-6, 10th seed) yet to go. The Chargers may be waiving bye-bye to their playoff hopes based on strength of schedule. Ravens have the Texans and the Browns left and the Steelers have Chiefs and Bengals. Ravens have the easiest schedule. Look for some movement over the next few weeks that does not bode well for the Chargers.

 

Niners (7-6, 8th seed) at Hawks (9-4, 5th seed): This will be such a good game. I hate the Niners, and I will love watching them implode during this game. I have never seen a bigger bunch of cry babies in the league -- fans and players included. The Niners should move over to the English Premier League where whining, flopping, and throwing your arms up in the air over the littlest infraction is common place. It's fine in soccer, it's been like that forever. That's not how you conduct yourself in the National Football League. Look at the Rams. People love the Rams because while they will not win the division or go to the playoffs, they conduct themselves with pride. The Vikings play every game with pride. Good for them and their fans. Niners fans are burning their Kaepernick jerseys. You know what? I bet the Niners of the past are glad that Candlestick closed. This new generation doesn't deserve to be associated with the glory of the past.

 

Cowboys (9-4, 7th seed) at Eagles (9-4, 3rd seed): This is the game of the week. Eagles (3rd seed), Hawks (5th seed), Lions (6th seed), and Cowboys (7th seed) all have a 9-5 record. That makes this game between division rivals that much more important and to a lot of teams. Clearly, the wild card is hotly contested which makes winning the division that much more crucial.

These two teams are pretty evenly matched, statistically speaking, save for passing. The Eagles come in at 8th and outrank the 18th overall Cowboys. However, some of those stats are due to Foles, and not Mark Sanchez. Cowboys already lost to Philadelphia at home and this game will be in Philly. I have no idea how Tony Romo's back is holding up, but I can't expect well. I'm sure in years to come he will be complaining of mind-numbing pain all over his body and will realize that it wasn't worth it at all. Some young punk will come on the Cowboys roster and Jerry Jones will be like "Tony who?" It's the sad state of affairs in the league, well, any profession. There is always someone there to take your place.

Just like someone very well may take the Eagles place as the 3rd seed.

 

Side note: Screw you Julio Jones for the ridiculous amount of fantasy points you obtained. You ruined my chances at a playoff spot. I hate you. Okay, not really, but come on!

Go For Two: Week 7 Games To Watch

What a week 6! Cowboys beat the Seahawks? God, now the Cowboys will never stop being the game of the week, or the game picked to be shown on regular television when the Niners or Raiders aren't on. Blech.

Some things we learned, Patriots were counted out too early. Joe Flacco had a huge week. The Falcons are on a downward slide, and the Browns are a legit, winning football team? Well, let's not get a head of ourselves, but they are 3-2 and are at .600.

Who's the best in the NFC East? Well, the Eagles made fast work of the Giants, so they aren't going to be too keen on all the gory going to the Cowboys.

Thank you Joe, thank you.

The week had some very, very thrilling games. Green Bay Packers versus the Miami Dolphins goes without saying. It came down to the last 3 minutes and Green Bay needed a lot of heroics to win that game. A Rodgers fumble actually almost ended the game with only 1:37 remaining, but a head's up play by Lang occurred when he quickly fell on the ball. In all actuality, it really came down to the last six seconds. The play before went to a rookie, Adams, on a fake snap and the last play to a backup now starter (?) tight end in Quarless.

The Bengals and the Panthers went into overtime but came out of the whole football battle STILL tied. San Diego and Oakland was a close game, but I didn't see it, as I don't give two craps about either of those teams.

This all begs the question, what surprises will come during week 7?

Week 7 games:

Bengals (3-1-1) at Colts (4-2): This should be a good game. The leads in the AFC North and AFC South will battle it out. It was a big disappointment when Cincinnati did not get a win against the Panthers. They had every opportunity. The kicker missed the big one, and that was that. The Bengals and the Colts have good offenses, but where this battle will be fought is on the Bengals defense, which is ranked 28th overall. Andrew Luck and company have the potential to put up big numbers and this Bengals defense is going to have it's hands full. It could be a shootout, but if the Bengals defense doesn't step it up, the Colts might do a repeat of the Jaguars, or the Titans, and the game will be a blowout.

Panthers (3-1-1) at Packers (4-2): This is a tough game. Even our Eligible Receiver writers can't decide to get on, or off, the Panthers bandwagon. One week they look great, the next week, not so much. What will they bring against the Packers?

The Packers are obviously coming off a huge high from their last drive-for-a-win against the Miami Dolphins. The thing is, on paper, the GBP look like crap. 26th overall offense, 19th on overall defense. I get the offense because Eddie Lacy keeps shitting eggs every week, save for that one game against the vikings, but really? Does that even count? I know this not only because the GBP are my favorite team, but I have him on my fantasy team and his ass is getting benched. If he improves later in the year, I'll give him the start, but right now, come on dude -- get it together.

A little more surprising is that the GBP are 20th in passing. Can it be true that the great Aaron Rodgers isn't high in the stats? That's concerning. We've been missing this season a great third receiver option. Perhaps after last week in Miami, Davante Adams, the rookie who had the head's up play of the game by catching Rodgers faked spike, will now fulfill that role left vacant by James Jones from last year, and two years ago from Greg Jennings. (FYI, I always get a little happy when receivers leave a team for more money and then they wind-up on shitty-shitty teams. You're welcome to the money Raiders James Jones and Minnesota Vikings Greg Jennings.)

49ers (4-2) at Broncos (4-1): These two teams are pretty evenly matched, save for the Broncos poor showing at the run. It will be interesting to see how the Niners do against the Broncos. Niners have won against two good teams, Dallas and Eagles, but were a little too close for comfort against the Rams who had to get their quarterback off the street and was actually released from the team at one point. One of their two losses was to Chicago, which is still trying to determine it's identity. The Cardinals are also a mixed bag, as they are a good team with a lot of injuries. The Broncos will prove to be their hardest challenge yet.

As for the Broncos, they have handily beat all the teams they won against. Their only loss was to Seattle, in Seattle. I feel as if, much like the GBP Achilles heel is the Niners, the Achilles heel for the Broncos is Seattle.

Therefore, the Niners will be a great challenge for Denver.

I look forward to this game. I do believe it is the game of the week.

Side notes:

Are you thinking I left out the Saints at the Lions. No, no I did not.

Also, as is the tradition this year, yet another horrible Monday night game. Honestly? Who picks these? Yes, Monday's game between the Rams and the Niners ended up being better than we thought, but still, come on. That wound-up being a good turn-of-luck. This week, ughh. Steelers at home against the Texans. Why? Seriously, why?

Side, side notes:

Get better Sam Shields and Tramon Williams, we need our starting cornerbacks healthy and ready to go!

Sideline Picks: NFL Week 1

Bengals @ Ravens

Pick Sideline Commentary
Allen
0-0
If there's a God, She must hate the Ravens by now, right? They unveiled a statue of Ray Lewis, though it lacks accuracy since he's not standing over murdered people. I'm sure a Ray Rice statue is coming.
Jackie
0-0
I am not sold on the Ravens this season. Bengals win, also known as The University of Georgia, the NFL version.
Lauren
0-0
I think the Baltimore home pride finds a way to (barely) beat the Bengals.
Madeline
0-0
Despite it being in Baltimore, I can’t pick this team. The Bengals are too good and the Ravens have really fallen off the talent and morality platform — and stating the Ravens are losing ground on the morality platform is really saying something.
Makeda
0-0
This is an anti-Ray Rice pick. It’s also an anti-suckage pick. The Ravens roster makes me yawn. Except Justin Tucker. He'll probably be the team's lead scorer in this game. AGAIN.

49ers @ Cowboys

Pick Sideline Commentary
Allen
0-0
This is a Tony Romo game. He's Mr. September.
Jackie
0-0
Sorry, LSum, despite all of San Francisco being suspended, I still think they win.
Lauren
0-0
Jackie, I feel you girl. The Niners are a solid pick, but I just can't vote against my Boys in the very first week.
Madeline
0-0
Tony Romo just had surgery on a disc. The team is not good. The Niners are great. Great beats not good.
Makeda
0-0
Everyone on the Niners D is suspended or injured, which means they’ve just evened the playing field against the third-worst defense in league history. So I’m picking between Kid Kap and Romo? Come on.

Chargers @ Cardinals

Pick Sideline Commentary
Allen
0-0
The Cardinals are going to be good, and Andre Ellington will lead me to fantasy glory.
Jackie
0-0
I have a huge crush on this team. Please don't let me down against a reasonable Chargers team.
Lauren
0-0
I'm trying to move to Phoenix and be a Cardinals bandwagon fan, yo. If there even is a Cardinals bandwagon to jump on....
Madeline
0-0
Why does everyone keep trying to convince us that the Chargers are good? If they still have Philip Rivers, that’s all I need to know. Who could really rally behind that guy? I like the Cardinals. Plus, it’s in AZ. Home team wins.
Makeda
0-0
I refuse to get behind Philip Rivers. Or Ryan Mathews. Or DANNY FUCKING WOODHEAD. Just…no. (In case you’re wondering, my annoyance with Danny Woodhead is completely irrational. He’s a completely average player and does not deserve my ire. But hey, that’s life.)

Trash Bowl: Washington Football Team @ Texans

Pick Sideline Commentary
Allen
0-0
I think the Texans just named LSum their starting quarterback. However, it's totally possible that Watt and Clowney will break RGIII into tiny pieces. I'm thinking Texans 4-0.
Jackie
0-0
My first thought was, "So who is playing QB for the Texans?" --- google --- Ryan Fitzpatrick? My second thought was, "Who is playing for the Redskins who is not a QB?" --- google --- ________________. Texans win. Except for my boy DeSean. Love that guy.
Lauren
0-0
GOD DAMN IT.
Madeline
0-0
I’m honestly struggling with this. What a train wreck. I guess I pick the Texans?
Makeda
0-0
Who is even on the Texans anymore? [reads above predictions] Fitzy is here now?? Seriously, Houston?! I know J.J. is good, but maybe don’t spend ALL your money on a single defensive player when you have no QB. You’re making me pick the Washington Football Team. You should be ashamed of yourselves.

NFL Preview: AFC North

Every year I suffer through the pain of baseball season, knowing that each drunken Nats game brings me a little closer to the beginning of football season. While this summer was no exception, somehow real life got in the way and football snuck up on me. Therefore, no extensive research went into the writing of this article. I basically read Deadspin’s Why Your Team Sucks series and called it a day.

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