Every year I suffer through the pain of baseball season, knowing that each drunken Nats game brings me a little closer to the beginning of football season. While this summer was no exception, somehow real life got in the way and football snuck up on me. Therefore, no extensive research went into the writing of this article. I basically read Deadspin’s Why Your Team Sucks series and called it a day.
Two (somewhat delusional) truths and a lie. Can you spot the lie?
1. Tony Romo threw for 441 yards and had MORE touchdowns (3) than interceptions (2).
2. My fantasy team is going to the playoffs!
3. The Cowboys are going to win the NFC East this year.
Dez Bryant (WR, Cowboys)
Oh Dez, you pesky little criminal, you. Allegedly he had 2 TDs and 145 yards on Thanksgiving. You know what I see what I check his stats? A fumble. And you know what I saw every time I came inside from dinner and checked the score of the game? Butterfingers dropping passes. Happy Thanksgiving, you scoundrel.