I almost didn’t write this post today because I’m still devastated over the Eagles’ loss. But other people’s teams won, I guess? UGH. Let’s just get this over with.

Remember how the Saints don’t win on the road in the playoffs? Well, no one told them that because they beat the Eagles 26-24 in Philadelphia in 25-degree weather. I was at a wedding Saturday (congrats, Mike and Angel!!) and told everyone I didn’t want to know anything about the score of the game until it was over. I lasted an hour before checking my phone. The reception ended early enough that I was able to watch the final quarter at the bar – which inexplicably was full of Saints fans. OF COURSE.

The Eagles held New Orleans to just two field goals in the first half but missed a huge opportunity to score when an early interception by Drew Brees resulted in Alex Henery booting a 48-yard field goal wide right. Philadelphia put up seven before halftime to pull ahead, but that lead was short-lived. The Saints scored touchdowns on their first two drives of the second half, while the Eagles went three and out on theirs.

Philadelphia scored another touchdown before the end of the third, but a costly false start penalty on 4th and 1 on their next drive forced them to kick a field goal and gave New Orleans the opportunity to extend their lead to 23-17. The Eagles found the end zone to bring the game to 24-23, but they gave the Saints a full five minutes to do nothing but score a field goal to win the game. The 32-yarder was good, so New Orleans travels to Seattle for next Saturday’s games. I’m hoping this plays out VERY similarly to the December 2 Monday night game.

At least Shady is still awesome.

Yes, I needed to post this from multiple angles because IT'S ALL I HAVE.

Meanwhile, the Chiefs led the Colts 38-10 with 13:39 in the third…and then lost 44-45. Yikes. Indy is the second playoff team in NFL history to come back from a deficit that big. (The largest comeback was when Buffalo rallied from 32 points back to beat Houston 41-38 in overtime in January 1993.)

On the one hand, the Kansas City offense was crippled by injuries: Jamaal Charles went out with a concussion on the Chiefs’ first drive, his backup Knile Davis hurt his knee in the fourth, and receiver Donnie Avery got a concussion. And the defense lost both cornerback Brandon Flowers (concussion) and linebacker Justin Houston (knee) in the second half. That said, if your banged-up offense is still able to put up 44 points, maybe don’t let Andrew Luck complete passes like this one?

The play above was the game-winning score, but T.Y. Hilton linked up with Luck for a total of 13 catches, 224 yards and two touchdowns. Not to be outdone, Luck threw for 443 yards, four touchdowns (damn!), and three interceptions (ouch!). But he took a page out of Matt Stafford’s playbook to help his team with this score early in the fourth.

How does that feel, Andy?

This isn’t a reaction to the fumble recovery TD, but the sentiment holds.

And for my straight female (or gay male) friends who don’t care about football but read these posts to support me, I have a gift for you courtesy of the Colts’ new punter Pat McAfee's Twitter.

Heeeeeeey there, Andrew.

The picture was obviously immediately taken down, but not before Deadspin got a hold of it. The Colts head to New England next week. If McAfee could post a shot of Brady like this, I would be much obliged.

Fun fact: the last four Super Bowl winners have been the opposing team in the Eagles’ home opener. (I hope we snap that streak by hosting Dallas next season.) The Chargers have done their best to keep the streak alive this season and yesterday’s game against the Bengals was no exception. San Diego beat Cincinnati 27-10, a win Andy Dalton deserves equal credit for, thanks to two interceptions and this move.

Alternate title for today's post: "Sad Andys"

But at least the Bengals have the support of fans of all ages.

Bengals fan

H/T to my coworker Andy for finding this picture for me.

As is to be expected, Philip Rivers bro’d the fuck out over the win…

And celebrated with…a bolo tie…?

Lauren was really excited about this tie – until she realized Rivers was the one wearing it.

The Chargers will play the Broncos in the later of the Sunday games next week, a matchup Lauren’s fellow Cowboys lover reacted to by saying, “That game could be…SNEAKY good.” Which is SO GROSS. Mostly because I hate Rivers because he is a huge fratty tool and I used to find his antics amusing but now I’m in a post-loss depression where I hate everyone and everything that succeeds in the NFL.

Which brings me to San Francisco. Why does California get such a great postseason? They already get awesome weather and good wine and cool people (LA excepted, #sorrynotsorry). IT’S NOT FAIR. The Niners bested Green Bay 23-20 at Lambeau Field in a game that might have been a bit chilly? I’m not sure. The NFL commentators are really bad about keeping you updated on game conditions. But Kid Kap didn’t seem to mind much.

65 with a light breeze, 5 with a subzero wind chill, it’s all the same really.

Kaepernick had a huge game, leading all players on both teams in both net (98) and average (14.0) rushing yards. Throwing for 227 yards and finding Vernon Davis for this TD didn’t hurt either.

Fun fact: Vernon Davis and Lauren are both Maryland alum. By the Transitive Property of Alma Maters, Lauren could have made that catch as well.

San Francisco took the lead early with a pair of field goals but only led 13-10 at the half. But the Niners were able to respond to Green Bay’s touchdown and field goal in the fourth with 10 points of their own, including this game-winning 33-yard field goal (set up by an 11-yard run by Mr. What Cold? himself).

Yes, that guy was 100% offsides, but Phil Dawson made the kick, so we get a fun GIF and the Niners get to play the Panthers next Sunday. Two young, mobile quarterbacks and two top-five defenses? There is nothing sneaky about how good that game could be. Don’t let me down, boys!

Leave a reply

required

Current ye@r *